Two men are talking. The
first says, "I got married because I was
tired of eating out, cleaning the house,
doing the laundry and wearing shabby
said the second, "I just got divorced for
the very same reasons."
Doi barbati discuta. Primul
spune: M-am insurat deoarece m-am saturat sa
mananc in oras, sa fac curatenie, sa spal si
sa umblu in haine jerpelite. Uimitor, spuse
cel de-al doilea. Eu tocmai am divortat pt
A woman was chatting with
her next-door neighbor.
"I feel really good today. I started out
this morning with an act of unselfish
generosity. I gave a twenty dollar bill to a
"You gave a bum twenty whole dollars? That's
a lot of money to just give away. What did
your husband say about it?"
"Oh, he thought it was the proper thing to
do. He said, 'Thanks.'"
O femeie statea la povesti
cu vecina sa. Ma simt foarte bine azi. Mi-am
inceput ziua cu un act altruist de
generozitate . Am dat o bancnota de 20 de
dolari unui vagabond. Ai dat unui vagabond o
intreaga bancnota de 20 de dolari? Sunt
multi bani ca sa-i dai numai asa. Sotul tau
ce-a zis de asta? Oh, a zis ca e lucrul cel
mai intelept. A spus:
A student engineer in the
office got engaged some time ago. At her
wedding, I was reminding her of the first
day she wore her ring. None of the other
women in the office even noticed.
Finally, in sheer and total exasperation,
she said "Boy !!! It's so warm in here
today, I think I'll take off my ring."
O studenta inginera de la
birou s-a logodit cu ceva timp in urma. La
nunta sa, i-am adus aminte de prima zi in
care a purtat inelul de logodna. Nicio
femeie de la birou nu i l-a remarcat. In
cele din urma intr-o adevarata disperare, ea
spuse: Dumnezeule! Ce cald e aici astazi,
cred ca imi voi da jos inelul
A few moments after the
daughter announced her engagement, her
Father asked, "Does this fellow have any
The daughter shook her head sadly. "Oh Daddy
! You men are all alike." sighing deeply,
she replied, "That's exactly what he asked
me about you.
La cateva momente dupa ce
fata isi anunta logodna, tatal o intreaba:
Acest baiat are ceva bani? Fata dadu din cap
cu tristete: Oh, tata! Voi barbatii sunteti
tot la fel. Suspina adanc si spuse: Exact
acelasi lucru m-a intrebat si el!
A couple had been married
for 25 years and was celebrating the
husband's 60th birthday. During the party, a
fairy appeared and said that because they
had been such a loving couple all those
years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife said, "We've been so poor all these
years, and I've never gotten to see the
world. I wish we could travel all over the
world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF!
She had the tickets in her hand. Next, it
was the husband's turn. He paused for a
moment, and then said, "Well, I'd like to be
married to a woman 30 years younger than
me." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He
Un cuplu casatorit de 25 de
ani, sarbatoreau cei 60 de ani pe care ii
implinea sotul. In timpul petrecerii, aparu
o zana, care le spuse ca datorita faptului
ca s-au iubit asa de mult, in toti acesti
ani, le va implini cate o dorinta fiecaruia.
Nevasta spuse: Am fost asa de saraci in toti
acesti ani, si nu am apucat sa vad lumea.
Mi-as dori sa calatorim in intreaga lume.
Zana isi undui mana si POOF! Avea biletele
in mana! Urma randul sotului. Tacu pt un
moment si spuse: Ei bine, mi-as dori sa fiu
casatorit cu o femeie cu 30 de ani mai
tanara decat mine. Zana isi undui mana si
POOF! Il facu de 90 de ani!
glume (bancuri, poante = jokes) sunt alese din
glumele care circula in limba engleza. Pentru o mai
buna intelegere a limbii engleze si o
imbunatatire a vocabularului, Academia de Engleza va
prezinta si traducerea lor. Aceste glume au fost
alese la intamplare.